I should have learned by now not to jinx things. That if I talked about how smoothly ECT was going some force somewhere would laugh in my face for acting so certain, so confident, that things were working out. Because the very next night after my first treatment I started to feel feverish, with chills…
Read MoreAll articles filed in anxiety
Don’t Miss the Flowers for the Freeze
It’s perhaps fitting that I last posted for New Year’s, and that I’m finally posting again just after Nowruz– the Persian New Year. I always felt that it was more natural to celebrate the new year with the arrival of spring. Spring is such a time for hope- new growth, new warmth, new babies. But…
Read MoreTake Some Self-Ease
On my last solo walk of this challenge, I thought a lot about solitude. I was never a fan of it in my younger years. In fact, I was so unaccustomed to being alone that I once asked Matt, before we were dating, whether he would bring a chair into the communal bathroom in our…
Read MoreFree Dogs, Free Therapy
During today’s first walk, I spent time talking with an old friend from high school. We talked about many things, but one thing we touched upon that got me thinking was the amount of stigma associated with seeking out help for mental illness. This strikes me as so odd given the prevalence of mental illness.…
Read MoreQuarantired
Matt and I both took the day before Christmas Eve off, to prepare for the arrival of his mom and her husband. Bailey still had daycare, so we had the luxury of being able to clean outside the confines of naptime and without a small, very well-meaning helper getting in the way. We were in…
Read MoreThe Santa Closet
A few days ago I walked with Nora- my oldest friend. We met in preschool, and pretty quickly became inseparable. One of the traits that united us was that we were wise beyond our years, as our teachers liked to remind us in each grade level we traveled through. As the holidays approach, I’m reminded…
Read MoreMisfortune-Telling
Last night, just before Matt and I went to bed, I started feeling upset and, at first, didn’t understand why. It wasn’t massive-mood-swing upset, so it didn’t scare me, but it did catch me off guard. “What’s wrong?” Matt asked, and it surprised me how quickly the answer came to me once he asked. “I’m…
Read MoreExpect the Unexpected
Yesterday I walked with an old high school friend I hadn’t talked to in a long time. This blog has been a great way to reconnect with people and hear more about their stories of pregnancy, childbirth, and child rearing as we all reach the age when that’s become more common. One of the things…
Read MoreA New Leash on Life
I’m not sure how to write about today’s walk because it had two poles of its own. On the one hand, I had a lovely walk with my friend from college where I recounted the ways in which I made genuine friendships with the most unexpected but inspiring people in the ward this time, and…
Read MoreJust In Headcase
Today, I’d like to write a post of appreciation for the nurse at my primary care physician. I had to laugh at the fatigue in her eyes when she saw me in the waiting room. For a moment, she forgot her pleasantries, and I could see a small part of her die as she recognized…
Read More
Postpartum Psychosisterhood 